When “Date night” doesn’t go as planned
This is a long one, but I just cannot edit too much, or necessary bits will be lost.
The other evening, Jerry & I were talking about the funny times we had when we were first "dating". We were both divorced, welcomed each other’s silliness and much-needed companionship. Believe it or not, at the time, we did not over-indulge in "adult beverages" as we regularly do now. One late Friday Fall evening, We decided to end the week with dinner & drinks at the local American Legion. When it was time to go, it was dark, and neither of us were in ANY condition to drive. We decided to leave my truck there, and walk the short distance back to my apartment. Around 400 feet into our freezing, uphill windy walk, I finally realized just how inebriated Jerry was, and for some inexplicable reason, he was missing his jacket. We quickly regretted this stoic decision to walk, but it was too late to turn back. As we passed the local Peking restaurant, We decided to duck into their foyer to quickly warm up, before continuing our freezing trek. The Korean owner is a very sweet, funny lady and happily greeted us . We rambled to her that we just ate, and we were there ONLY to warm up for a moment. She was pretty quick to assess our "Condition", and said "You two hungry???". as our inebriated minds caught a whiff of something insanely delicious, without hesitation we said “Yea, we could eat”..".. two menus magically appeared in our hands and we were now ordering food to-go. (remember. We JUST had dinner at the Legion).
She was a pro. Her suggestive selling skills were amost overwhelming. Like a well-trained secretary, quickly scribbling down countless entrees & sides. As she tapped her finger on Jerry’s menu, and in a thick Korean accent said, “Hey, you always order this!!” In his current state i’m not sure Jerry even knew where we were, much less what he was ordering. With an over-exaggerated smile, he just repeated, OK, OK to everything she said, never looking up from the menu. When she turned to me, instead of a watch, it was like she was swinging a shrimp on the end of chain, watching my eyes go back and forth... the master knew my true weakness!!! "AND Shrimp? she said.. “Liz, you like shrimpy yes???? "I replied... "Oh YEA!!" As Jerry was still blankly nodding at every "suggestion", I managed to break eye contact to call my 17 yo daughter, who was back at my apartment with a few girlfriends. I said "Honey, I will give you $10 if you and the girls run down to the legion, get my truck and bring it home. We are being responsible and I don't want it to be seen there all night!" her reply.. "You mean you don't want everyone to see you two are lushes?" I didn't like her tone, but said nothing. After a long pause, muffled giggling & background discussion , a confident voice declared ..." WE will do it for $30.00" "WE!!”??? I replied... (3 girls, $10 each.. pretty clever actually).. I reluctantly agreed. after Jerry paid for our $90.00 "2nd" dinner, we finally made it home, warmed up and turned in for the night.
The next morning, we were comically summarizing the evening before. Instead of taking a $6 cab home, we braved a dark, frigid uphill walk, , spent $30 in blackmail money, and THEN realized all the Chinese food we hauled home was missing. We never did find Jerrys jacket. at least he was wearing shoes...... and Yes, the once full gas tank on my truck was sitting on E. Jerry said, " I think last night we financed AND fed a fun H.S. party somewhere ". yeesh.. dating is expensive!~